Wednesday, November 26, 2003

Family pressure

My mother is annoying me. Again.Sigh. Much as I love her, she does drive me mad sometimes.

My mom is a real pain when it comes to forward planning - she likes to plan years in advance if she can. And I am not a planner - I have to be organised and methodical at work, so in my own time I like do to what the whim takes me. One example about my mother - in 2000, to celebrate my parents 40th wedding anniversary, we went to Florida as a whole family for Easter. My parents (and my sister too - she has inherited some of this) booked their flights to Florida early. Like 15 months before they were going. Well, you know - flights to Florida book up really early, and they had to book them? And for the next 10 months, every single time I spoke to her she would ask me if I had booked my flights yet, because it was Easter, didn't I know that all the flights were going to be gone, and then I wouldn't be able to go. I put up with this for 10 months, and then 5 months before Easter, I caved in. She has done the same this year - when my sister looked online in February of this year, and she could find no flights to Florida for the Easter holiday, they panicked and booked a holiday to LA. Didn't it occur to them that perhaps not all the flights were published yet? Obviously not.

Anyway, the point of this ramble. Normally, around May of each year I get the "What are you doing for Christmas?" conversation. To which the response is always "I don't know, god that's months away," to be met with "But you have to get it sorted so everyone knows what everyone is doing". This year, there have been no such conversations. None at all. Even on Saturday, when we were out in my dad's car and they were talking in the front about what THEY were going to be doing for Christmas - either going to my sisters, or maybe go to my sister's brother-in-law's - not one word to me about it.

I know what this is all about. She doesn't want me to commit to going up to home, 'in case' I decide to go and spend Christmas with X. I have given her no reason to think this, but she is just waiting for me to 'come to my senses and run off to Scotland to be a good wifey'.

And tonight I phoned her. Everything was going fine - talking about my dad and his snooker, and how she is going to some stately home tomorrow with her friends, when out of the blue "Is X coming down?" Huh? How should I know? Foolishly I thought she was talking about him coming down to theirs to sort out his furniture that is currently in their garage. Oh no, it's worse than that. She wants to know when he is coming down TO SEE ME. "Erm, he's not." Met with complete bafflement - I mean, why on earth wouldn't I want my X to come and spend a weekend with me? I suppose we have seen each other four times since we split, but that has been over 18 months. Surely it is normal to be tapering these off now, not making more frequent trips?

I guess she is just hoping we will get back together - I mean, why else have I come back to Britain?

Sigh! Not sure I can deal with this.

Oh - and my sister put my mother on the spot on Saturday night by asking me what I was doing for Christmas in front of her. "I don't know - I haven't been invited anywhere yet." So, off to my sister's it is!

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