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Monday, December 22, 2003

Internet weirdos


Okay, so everyone knows there are a lot of them about. But I pretty much pride myself on being able to filter out the truly weird (well, more weird than me anyway). However, I was in a chat room Friday night (okay, I know, Billy No-mates and everything), and I was pretty drunk. I got talking to this bloke who it turns out lives in Northampton. Maybe 10 minutes walk from my house. We laughed, and chatted in a normal sort of way - no different really from say, when I bumped into the Stoke Boys in New York and discovered we were from same county. I even looked at him on webcam (after verifying he was dressed, and all I would see would be his face - honest!).

Then, out of the blue.

"So, shall I come over now for sex?" (He said this, not me!)

"What? No!"

"Oh go on, I can be there in 10 minutes."

"Ummm. No."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't know you."

"Well, look at it this way. It's like meeting a bloke in a club for the last slow dance, then going outside and shagging him in the alley."

"I can honestly say I have never done that."

"Look," he says, at this point proving how sincere he is by brandishing three condoms to the cam.

"Hmmm, very nice, very thoughtful. But no. Thanks."

"Oh well. My girlfriend is back tomorrow."

His live-in girlfriend might I add. Who had been away, and was due back the next day. Who he had been with for 2 years. Nice guy............

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