Saturday, December 27, 2003

Quotes from my Christmas

My mother, when I asked her if she liked my new boots, in front of one of her neighbours and his three kids -
   "How's your pussy?"

My brother-in-law, on losing one of his 'Atari style' games to his 16 year old son -
   "That's because he spends so many hours playing with his joystick in his bedroom."

My brother-in-laws mother -
   "Ooh, look at Santa flashing in the corner!"

My brother-in-laws mother again -
   "Come on Rich, liven us all up with a flash!"

My dad, to me, on enquiring where I had been -
   "Have you been upstairs stroking your pussy?"

My mom, to my nephew, trying to convince him that he didn't need a nutcracker to open walnuts -
   "Put two of them in your hand, and squeeze them together really tightly."

I have had a Mrs Slocum Christmas!

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