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Wednesday, April 28, 2004

Sigh


I feel such a bitch. But if I am honest, I am not really sure what to do - it's been so long I've forgotten.

Haven't seen Big G for a long time now - since before Mother's Day. Circumstances - his daughter, me having to ferry the cat back and forth, friends visiting, him working weekends. Now I am making excuses - avoiding ringing him, basically being a coward.

A couple of weeks ago, if things had turned out differently, I would have slept with someone else. I am not in the habit of sleeping with several people at a time. Even though me and Big G are not what you would call serious, I am still not the type of person to sleep with someone behind his back. But, I am also not the type of person who will just let him go and make a break, it seems. Coward, I know.

However, he lives so far away, and dumping by phone seems a bit cruel. Better than email or text I suppose, lol. But then I don't want him driving to see me, for me to just dump him and make him drive back.

Sigh.

Hopefully he has at least picked up on my cowardly actions.

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